I have had this post in my head for a while now. I have been getting really uncomfortable with the messages we are sending our children. Especially our boys. I have 3 girls and 1 boy. I grew up in a female-dominated family, as one of 5 daughters. My husband grew up in a male-dominated family with 4 sons and 1 daughter.
I grew up learning that girls were strong and capable of anything. My husband grew up learning boys were strong and capable of anything. I think both our parents taught us the right thing.
I am really passionate about equality for women. Some people assume that because I am a sahm by choice, and a fairly ‘traditional’ wife, that I don’t believe in pushing my daughters to become strong, intelligent women. My girls often say that they want to be mums when they grown but they want to do this job or that, and are torn by the two. I explain to them that they can do both and that being a sahm is a choice. Either way, they need to do something with their lives, whether it’s traditional work or sahm work.
In the same way, I believe that my son should be strong and intelligent. I believe that if he choses to stay home and look after his children, that’s ok too. Either way, he too needs to do something with his life.
I keep seeing a lot of advertising on tv lately that shows men being submissive and dominated by women. This ad in particular really bugs me.
I understand that after hundreds of years of female oppression, we are spreading our wings a little, seeing how far we can take our freedom. However, I think this ad is touching on something that will backfire eventually. Think about it, if the roles were reversed and the man was telling the woman, no you can’t take your golf clubs and you look ridiculous in that hat, I can assure you there would be public uproar! Why then, is it ok for a woman to talk to a man like this? Why is it ok for anyone in any relationship to shut them down like that? Do you think the history of our oppression makes this ok?
I know this was just meant for a bit of fun, but I think through these ads we are sending the wrong message to our kids.
In my opinion, it isn’t ok to deny your partner time out when they need it. In the same way it shouldn’t be denied to me.
In my opinion, it isn’t ok to dictate how your partner should dress if he/she feels comfortable in what they are wearing. In the same way it shouldn’t be denied to me.
In my opinion, one partner should not dominate the other. Sure, there is usually a stronger personality in most relationships, but that means that the other person needs more quiet consultation.
I want my daughters AND son to be strong and intelligent. To voice their concerns and opinions openly, but they should never make another person feel dominated, and I pray they themselves never feel dominated.
It’s time we wake up to the messages we are sending our sons and daughters. Teach them love, compassion and respect for others’ feelings. Teach them to stand up for their beliefs without compromising their own behaviour.
What are your thoughts on this? Do you see this as a problem? Do you think I am over reacting?